When you were young, your mother got tired of changing your diaper every time
that you pissed and she trained you to only piss when you were on the potty.
Usually, this was a pot, about the size of one of her cooking pots, and just
about as big. And, every time that you successfully made it to the pot to
piss instead of using a diaper there was a celebration - for a while.
BASIC #1: This can not be a
'sometimes' thing. If you want to be truly incontinent, then you need to be
incontinent all of the time. This means that you must wear a diaper all of
the time. The ONLY time that you don't wear a diaper is
when you are showering.
BASIC #2: You have spent many
years controlling your pee and your poop. It is a learned skill that you
learned when you were a small child - probably. Just as you learned how to
control them, you now have to learn how to 'uncontrol' them. It took
practice to gain control. It will take practice to lose control.
ANATOMY 101: There are two kidneys
up inside your body that filter impurities out of your blood. They also soak
up the excess liquid in your body and they convert all of this to pee and
send it to your bladder. Your bladder is nestled at the very bottom of your
torso. To find it, right over your penis or your vagina, if you press down
hard, you will feel the bone that is your pelvis. Your bladder is right
behind this bone. If you bring your fingers up just a little toward your
belly button, the bone ends and you can feel the top of the bladder.
#1: Always, always wear a diaper, all day, all night,
all of the time.
The goal is to get the sphincter muscle so that it is totally relaxed all of the time. Totally relaxed and letting the bladder empty itself naturally. You also have to get your mind trained to ignore your bladder and it's sphincter muscle.
Work on being able to pee while you are walking down the street, without missing a beat.
If you are sitting in class at school, practice relaxing your sphincter muscle, even if you don't feel the need to pee.
If you are at work, just let your sub-conscious take over and relax the muscle and let the pee come out.
After you have emptied your bladder, note how relaxed the sphincter muscle is. Work on keeping that relaxed feeling for as long as you can.
Drink lots of plain water during the day. Your body needs a lot of water, at least 8 ounces of water or juice at least 8 times a day. Avoid alcohol while you are learning. "What goes in must come out". Plain water will act as a mild diuretic and you will have to piss more often. It also flushes out your body and removes toxins and other bad things. Because this makes you piss more often it speeds up the un-training process.
Do NOT force the pee to come out. If only a little wants to come out, that's just fine. Don't push it. Let it flow naturally. If you try to force the piss to come out you are exercising the muscles that you are trying to weaken.
While the pee is coming out make a conscious note to yourself about how good it feels, and how much you like it. Congratulate yourself for having done this.
For some/most people, within 7-10 days you are going to be finding yourself with a wet diaper and you won't realize that it happened until it is all over. This marks the start of your conversion and tells you that you are on the right track and that you are making progress. This is not complete incontinence, it's only the first sign that you are adapting. With each passing day you will experience this sensation more and more. It may be several weeks before your un-training is complete.
Night Time Wetting
At night, put on a fresh diaper. As you are going to sleep, keep telling yourself that it's all right to pee without waking up. Do that every night. If you do wake up in the night having to pee, roll into whatever position is easiest for you to pee in while you are in bed, and let it go - trying to not wake up any more than you have to. Then drop back off to sleep. This can take up to several weeks for it to be effective. (It may take MANY nights to figure out the best position for peeing while you are in bed. The proper position is VERY important for many people!)
A lot of this depends on MANY factors. How early you were potty trained; how easy it is for you to relax your piss control muscles; how deeply you sleep; etc. It takes a LOT of work to undo what your mother spent a long time training you to do! :-)
When you are laying in bed, try various positions. On your back, on your stomach, as well as trying both sides. Sometimes it's a matter of getting those control muscles shifted just right inside your body. Try it with your legs straight out. Try it with your knees bent.
You may be trying too hard, too.
You might try getting some drugs at the store that will make you sleep more soundly. Melatonin is good. Benadryl is good. And, there are other over-the-counter drugs being sold specifically for making you sleep. The idea here is to get you so relaxed and so sound asleep that you will sleep through it. However, you may be quite groggy the next day after you take anything to make you sleep, especially if you increase the quantity above the recommended dosage (which you may well have to do to get the level of sleep you need to lose control).
Drinks with caffeine are going to tend to keep you awake and more alert. During this initial phase of trying to get started, I recommend that you avoid beverages containing caffeine. OTOH, caffeine will act like a diuretic for most people. When you are at the drug store, find some diuretic pills that don't contain caffeine, and try taking some of those before you go to bed.
NOTE: I have NO idea of how safe, or dangerous, it is to combine those various drugs. Especially when you are using quantities in excess of the recommended dosage.
Before you go to bed, wet your diaper a little. I am told by several people that once they have a wet diaper on that it's a lot easier to piss the next time. (It's all a mind game!)
As you drop off to sleep keep telling your sub-conscious that it's all right to wet the bed. This is a form of self-hypnosis and in the few moments before you fall into a complete sleep your brain is very susceptible to these thoughts. As you rouse up in the night with the need to pee, imagine that you are standing in front of the toilet peeing.
It may take many nights of trying these steps before you have success.
NOTE: I have made several suggestions about things that you can eat, drink, or otherwise swallow to assist you with your un-training. If you choose to follow any of these suggestions, you do so at your own risk. There is an inherent risk every time that you take something inside of your body. Mixing various things that are supposedly safe can be dangerous. (Aspirin and Ibuprofin don't mix, for example.) In some cases, you may have to take a bigger dose than the manufacturer recommends. This can be dangerous, or it can be very effective.
QUESTIONS? Ask Big Daddy